Telling the Children

We had planned on breaking the news of my cancer to the kids while we were in a family meeting at the local Gilda's Club. Gilda's Club, for those not familiar with it, is an organization started by Gene Wilder, the husband of the late comedian, Gilda Radner. Gilda died of cancer and Gene started the club in her honor. They offer a place for people to meet and share their experiences regarding cancer. Brenda and I had already attended a new member meeting. We had a meeting set up for the whole family, with one of their trained counsellors. We were on the way to the meeting when Daveon, our youngest, got sick all over the van. We had to turn around and go back home. My wife and I decided we needed to go ahead and break the news to them by ourselves, as they already knew something was up.

Telling them about my cancer and possible death was the hardest thing I think we ever had to do. Brenda did most of the talking, bless her heart. We all used many tissues that night. The littlest ones did not really understand what we were talking about, other than mommy and daddy were very upset.

We have always tried to be open and honest with our children. We continue to reaffirm to them that daddy has cancer and will be very sick for awhile. We also tell them constantly that daddy will keep fighting and hopefully be around for a long time. But we also make sure they know that things will continue to be rough and that daddy might not make it. We tell them frequently how much we love them and things will be okay. We have many friends and relatives that have been very supportive. I am sure that if I lose my fight with cancer that the support will be there to help Brenda and the family. For now all we can do is fight the hard fight and pray for a miracle. Enough for now - take care and God Bless.